A few years ago — in October 2023 — my husband and I were exhausted. Overworked. In serious need of a vacation.
We had traveled a lot before kids. But once our children were born, every trip involved driving. Flying felt… impossible.
For those who are new here: both of our children are autistic and both experienced significant language delays.
- My daughter didn’t start talking until she was 3
- My son didn’t start talking until he was 6½
Their language is still limited, and both rely heavily on echolalia.
And let me say this clearly:
Non-verbal does not mean silent.
Not even close.
Both of my kids have strong vocal stims, which means our house is loud. Our car is loud. Anywhere we go as a family tends to be loud.
So in October 2023, when we decided to board a plane to Barcelona, Spain, take a 7-day Mediterranean cruise, and then spend another week in Barcelona before flying home to Virginia… I was terrified.
The Anxiety Before Traveling With Autistic Kids
My brain was loud with “what ifs”:
- What if they were too loud?
- What if they became overstimulated?
- What if they needed to regulate while stuck in a coach seat?
I packed everything:
- Activities
- Tablets
- Snacks
- Headphones
- Over-the-counter motion sickness meds (that we never even used)
We booked a direct overnight flight going there (not coming home), hoping sleep would work in our favor.
And here’s what we learned:
Our kids were more ready than we realized.
Flying With Autistic Children: What Actually Happened
The steady noise and movement of the airplane helped regulate them.
Our youngest fell asleep easily.
Our oldest enjoyed switching between shows on the seatback screen — not watching anything all the way through, but the variety kept her calm.
Eventually, she slept too.
It wasn’t perfect. But it was possible.
The Challenges We Didn’t Anticipate: ARFID & Food
What we didn’t plan for was food.
At the time, my son’s ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) was still new to us. I hadn’t yet learned that:
- Safe foods can become unsafe in new environments
- A croissant from Starbucks at home ≠ a croissant in Barcelona
- Even the same brand doesn’t always feel the same to an autistic child
Food quickly became our biggest challenge — and still is today.
Why This Trip Changed Everything
Despite the challenges, we made incredible memories:
- The Barcelona aquarium (a huge hit)
- A parade at Vatican City in Rome that is still talked about
- Swimming in the Mediterranean in Cannes, France
- Exploring castles and historic sites across France and Italy
- Evenings spent watching movies and relaxing in our balcony hot tub
That trip became a turning point for our family.
We realized something important:
The biggest limitations on our family were the ones we placed on ourselves.
Yes — our kids have vocal stims.
Yes — they can get loud.
But with a regulation-first mindset, travel became not only possible, but joyful.
From One Trip to a Whole New Life
That realization led to a big decision.
In 2024, my husband began seeking employment overseas so that:
- I could homeschool full-time (instead of working and homeschooling)
- We could travel as a family
- Our children could experience the world
We refused to hide our kids out of fear of other people’s opinions.
In 2025, we moved to Belgium.
Since then, we’ve traveled throughout Belgium, visited Germany for Christmas markets, and explored France — with trips planned to Amsterdam, Prague, Scotland, Luxembourg, and Paris.
How We Travel With Autistic Kids (Practically Speaking)
Here’s what actually makes it work:
1. Regulation First — Always
Before every trip, I research:
- Kid-centered activities
- Parks and open spaces
- Museums or experiences they might enjoy
If we’re staying overnight, I look for hotels with pools.
Pools are gold for sensory regulation — even though they’re harder to find in Europe than in the U.S. In Antwerp, we stayed at the Hyllit Hotel, their pool and sauna were 2 hours of absolute GLORIOUSNESS!
2. Built-In Regulation Breaks
We seek out:
- Less crowded areas
- Alcoves and quiet spaces
Places where our kids can jump, flap, stim, and reset without stress.
3. Parents Regulate Too
My husband and I protect our own regulation.
He loves walking cities at night — photography, pubs, silence.
I decompress with:
- A hot shower
- A good book
- A great hotel view
We take turns and give each other space, because regulated parents = regulated kids.
Food: Still the Hardest Part
Food remains our biggest challenge.
- My son has a very limited list of safe foods
- We pack a lot of snacks
- Longer trips require more planning and flexibility
Our daughter is more flexible — steak, pasta, chicken nuggets — which helps.
We also bring separate portable chargers so:
- We can navigate and document our trips
- Our kids can use tablets to regulate during meals
Involving Our Kids (Even With Limited Language)
We include them whenever possible:
- Letting our youngest choose which direction to walk
- Asking simple questions
- Following their interests when we can
Even with limited language, engagement matters.
The Most Important Rule: I’m Okay Leaving
This is the key.
I go into every outing expecting that we might have to leave early:
- A museum
- A restaurant
- A day trip
If we don’t have to leave? That’s the best feeling.
If we do? It doesn’t sting.
Sometimes I take the kids outside while my husband finishes eating and brings my food to-go. This works for our family — yours might look different.
The point is: leaving is not failure.
If You Feel Trapped at Home — I See You
If you’re parenting an autistic child and feel like a prisoner in your home…
I get it. I’ve been there.
But I want you to know:
Travel is possible. Life can be bigger than your fear.
Follow along and you’ll see:
- The good
- The hard
- The messy
…and the joy that comes with choosing regulation over restriction.
