I’ve been watching a lot of homeschooling videos on YouTube lately, and at least three of them mentioned something that stuck with me: they were discouraged by healthcare providers from homeschooling their autistic children.
The reasoning? That parents wouldn’t be able to provide the same level of resources and support that schools can.
As a former teacher, a parent to two very different autistic children, and a homeschooling mom, I have to be honest—I don’t buy it.
Let me explain why.
Our Experience in Public School Special Education
Both of my children were enrolled in public school special education programs at different schools based on where services were available. At the time, I was also working full-time outside the home.
My daughter was in school from pre-K through 1st grade before I pulled her out. My son attended pre-K only.
During those years, my daughter experienced frequent “outbursts”—verbal stimming, bouncing in her desk (which created noise), and difficulty completing tasks. She had a full-time aide who rotated regularly so she wouldn’t become too attached.
When she became overwhelmed, she was often taken out of the classroom to walk the hallways until she calmed down. The problem was… she rarely returned to finish the work. I would request the assignments be sent home, and I would complete them with her after working full-time (many battles were had over this).
At her 1st grade IEP meeting, I raised a concern: I thought she might be bored and needed more academic challenge.
I was told, very directly, that academics were not the priority. The focus was on teaching her to sit quietly and interact appropriately with peers.
That moment changed everything for me.
I pulled her out immediately after that meeting.
Transitioning Into Homeschooling
At first, I continued working full-time while homeschooling at night. I was fortunate that my parents lived nearby and supported this decision—my mom helped care for my daughter while I worked.
We had challenges. We had growing pains. But eventually, we found our rhythm.
Then everything shifted again.
One afternoon, we picked up my son from school and discovered he had been assaulted.
We pulled him out immediately.
We reported it to the school, but we were dismissed. It became our word against theirs. Looking back, I wish I had done more—but at the time, my only goal was to keep him safe.
That experience changed our trajectory completely.
Where We Are Now
Today, two years later, I am a stay-at-home mom living in a foreign country where we don’t speak the language (we are here for my husband’s work).
And in this season of life, I can do so much more with my children than I ever could before.
People often talk about “socialization” when it comes to homeschooling. Some might even assume my daughter is socially unaware when we’re in public.
But the truth is the opposite.
What Socialization Actually Looks Like in Our Homeschool
We didn’t isolate ourselves—we entered the real world with intention.
We practiced social skills in real environments:
- Hotel pools
- Playgrounds
- Waiting in line at Disney World
- Grocery stores and public spaces
- Homeschool co-op groups
Instead of hoping my children would “pick up” social cues naturally, I was there to guide them in real time—helping them navigate conversations, emotions, and expectations.
It wasn’t perfect. But it was real, and it was meaningful.
How My Children Are Doing Now
My son, who is now 8, is blossoming.
He is healing from experiences we may never fully understand, but each day he is growing in confidence, language, and independence. My daughter continues to develop in her own beautiful, unique way.
Both of my children are now semi-verbal. My daughter began speaking around age 3, and my son not until age 6.
We are still on a journey—but we are moving forward.
And I’ll be honest: they teach me just as much as I teach them.
Why I Believe Homeschooling Autistic Children Can Work
Homeschooling is not for the faint of heart. It is not for everyone. But I firmly believe that when a parent is called to it, it can be life-changing.
Here are my top five reasons I believe you can homeschool your autistic child successfully:
1. Regulation
My children have the freedom to learn in a way that supports their nervous systems.
We can start at 8:30 or 10:00. We can pause for movement breaks on the trampoline or use spinning chairs. We can take 8-minute resets whenever needed.
Learning is flexible, not forced.
2. Knowledge of Your Child
No one knows your child like you do.
You understand their triggers, their strengths, and their emotional patterns. That allows you to pace learning in a way that supports growth without overwhelming them.
3. Freedom of Scheduling Therapy and Support
Therapy waitlists are long, and school schedules are rigid.
Homeschooling gives us flexibility to schedule appointments earlier in the day or during openings that wouldn’t otherwise be possible.
4. Guided Real-World Learning
Because my children struggle with language and social communication, we intentionally practice real-life interactions:
- Role-playing social scenarios
- Practicing greetings and conversations
- Navigating public spaces together
We build skills through lived experience, not just theory.
5. The Ability to Change the Plan Instantly
This one might be my favorite.
For example, I once created a sentence-building activity where my son rolled dice to create words and write sentences.
It quickly became overwhelming.
So we adjusted:
- First, he wrote it
- Then he dictated it
- Eventually, I wrote while he focused on structure
We didn’t abandon the lesson—we adapted it so the learning stayed intact without the meltdown.
That flexibility is everything.
Final Thoughts
We don’t live a perfect life. But we do live a connected one.
We travel, we explore, and we learn in real-world environments across the United States and Europe. My children are learning how to navigate life—not just sit quietly in a classroom.
We have fewer meltdowns because we are not constantly pushing against environments that don’t fit them.
Instead, we build a life that fits them.
I may not know exactly what the future holds for my children, but I do know this: I will be there every step of the way, adjusting, supporting, and advocating for what they need.
I’d Love to Hear From You
Why do you homeschool?
Or if you’re on the fence—what’s holding you back?
Let’s talk about it.